ask-female-japan:

alfred-f-jones-world-hero:

Hetalia Episode 1

America: Dude, I think the World Conference can convene. Solving all of today’s problems by talking excessively! No matter how hard it seems, we can fix anything with enough meetings and photo ops. Feel free to speak honestly while protecting your chances for re-election. I’ll go first! About that whole using global warming to enslave humanity thing, I think we’ll be okay if we genetically engineer a huge hero and have him protect the Earth - I give you the super hero, ‘Globoman’!

Japan: I agree with America.

Switzerland: Man up or I’ll beat you with my peace prize!

England: There’s no way some hero will help global warming or humanity’s enslavement.

France: If Britain and America don’t agree, how can I be superior by dissing them both?

America: You Frenchies just love to hate America. Why not go back to making us hot green chick statues like you used to?

China: Western nations are so immature. I doubt they ever grow up. Maybe I can try appealing to the only option of theirs that seems to work. Would you guys like to sample some Chinese tasty treats?

France and Britain: We’d just get hungry again!

Spain: Hey, why don’t you say something Russia? They’ll stop fighting if you go over and step in.

Russia: What? Why me? No thanks. I want to see Lithuania get in big trouble and come crawling back for help. Then Latvia will be right behind.

Estonia: You’re so tough, next you’ll try to pick a fight with Haiti.

China: Please everyone, calm down!

Germany: Everyone shut up!

England and France: Germany?!

Germany:We’ve called this conference to solve the world’s problems, not to fight about the problems of our past. And since I’m the only country who seems to know how to run a meeting, we’ll follow my rules from here on out. Eight minutes each for speeches, no chit chat about side deals, and absolutely no going over the time limit. Now if you want to go, make sure you’re prepared and raise your hand, but do so in a way that does not mock any salute of my country’s past. [Italy’s hand goes up] Germany recognizes his friend Italy!

Italy: Pasta!

*is hit by a huge wave of nostalgia*